DOES GOD USE DISAPPOINTMENT?
Love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return;...and you will be sons of the Most High; for he is kind to the ungrateful and the selfish. Luke 6:35, R.S.V.
Parents are always looking for an available arsenal of methods to use to get their children to obey. If you are a parent, you probably recognize most of the methods: coaxing, stern commanding, sweet enticing, lengthy sermonizing. Sometimes in sheer desperation we resort to badgering and belittling. I can remember the time I looked coldly at my daughter (following what I considered to be a major infraction) and said, "Julie, after all I've done for you, I am so disappointed in you!"
I was even more disappointed when it didn't lead her to immediate repentance and transformation. But later, when our feelings had calmed, she told me how she felt when I said that. She described the feelings of crushing hopelessness, rejection, loss of self-esteem, and of impossible indebtedness. And--as usual--I found myself reviewing my methods of parenting as well as my understanding of God.
Does God manipulate us with goodness? Does He say, "After all I've done for you, what are you going to do for Me?" What does it mean to "expect nothing in return"? For us to expect favor, and then feel disappointed if the favor is not returned. Then that disappointment is often used (through subtle comments, glances of the eye, or sullen moods) to make sure that, next time, the favor is returned.
If one is not grateful for all the good things we do, then, in human terms, the kindnesses stop, for they were done to induce gratefulness. But if Jesus called us to come up higher than this, wouldn't we expect His Father not to stoop to such methods?
Our Father does good because He is good, not as a means of leverage upon us. He keeps on being kind, even to the ungrateful, because His kindness was not a conditional kindness in the first place. Even His acts of discipline are expressions of kindness, for He wants His friends to live within the boundaries of reality.
God's great kindness to us is intended to inspire us rather than to control us, to heal us rather than to crush us with impossible indebtedness. Unconditional love draws us into wholeness; conditional love drives us to despair.
Love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return;...and you will be sons of the Most High; for he is kind to the ungrateful and the selfish. Luke 6:35, R.S.V.
Parents are always looking for an available arsenal of methods to use to get their children to obey. If you are a parent, you probably recognize most of the methods: coaxing, stern commanding, sweet enticing, lengthy sermonizing. Sometimes in sheer desperation we resort to badgering and belittling. I can remember the time I looked coldly at my daughter (following what I considered to be a major infraction) and said, "Julie, after all I've done for you, I am so disappointed in you!"
I was even more disappointed when it didn't lead her to immediate repentance and transformation. But later, when our feelings had calmed, she told me how she felt when I said that. She described the feelings of crushing hopelessness, rejection, loss of self-esteem, and of impossible indebtedness. And--as usual--I found myself reviewing my methods of parenting as well as my understanding of God.
Does God manipulate us with goodness? Does He say, "After all I've done for you, what are you going to do for Me?" What does it mean to "expect nothing in return"? For us to expect favor, and then feel disappointed if the favor is not returned. Then that disappointment is often used (through subtle comments, glances of the eye, or sullen moods) to make sure that, next time, the favor is returned.
If one is not grateful for all the good things we do, then, in human terms, the kindnesses stop, for they were done to induce gratefulness. But if Jesus called us to come up higher than this, wouldn't we expect His Father not to stoop to such methods?
Our Father does good because He is good, not as a means of leverage upon us. He keeps on being kind, even to the ungrateful, because His kindness was not a conditional kindness in the first place. Even His acts of discipline are expressions of kindness, for He wants His friends to live within the boundaries of reality.
God's great kindness to us is intended to inspire us rather than to control us, to heal us rather than to crush us with impossible indebtedness. Unconditional love draws us into wholeness; conditional love drives us to despair.
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